August in melody

I was just taking the stairs to my room in Jakarta just before midnight when I think to myself “this is exactly why I won’t stay for long in this city”. Jakarta keep me busy and exhaust me and I hate it for that.

Before, I couldn’t answer everytime folk ask me why I refuse to stay here. I just knew that something wasn’t right, but I didn’t know what it was. And I didn’t bother because despite all the bad things, I love this city for its friendship and for all the important lessons about life that I experience in this sleepless town.

But as I contemplate more about life, now it become clear to me that space is a significant aspect in my life. In which Jakarta failed to offer for it’s being super crowd & hectic. And I couldn’t help but to feel like a robot here.

But then one night, as I was walking home from work I met this cute little cat in the street. I was in a pretty good mood so I made a cat sound to tease it. I wasn’t expecting the cat to follow me but it did follow me through. And that made my entire day.

This fact struck me with an idea that you can always find beauty in life even in a simplest form. You can always find happiness even in the most chaotic situation. It’s just a matter of how you open yourself for it. Expectation sometimes caught us in negative thought so we always complaining, thinking bad about other people, and blame each other.

“Have a little patient and breath, Kiki” I’ll whisper myself whenever I feel overwhelmed. And there’s no place other than Jakarta that made me repeat this message over and over again. It’s kinda funny now that I realize it.

And btw August, thank you so much for punch me in the face this year. Being 25 now I realize that I’m not a special snowflake and it’s okay. Life will not always offer me cherry but that’s fine too. That’s the beauty of it. Life is a mystery and it’s exciting! It’s not fun if we knew how we’re going to end up. So embrace the enigma of life and you’re gonna be fine.