July in melody


I’ve been asking this question to myself lately. “What’s the most meaningful aspect in your life, Kiki?”. And I couldn’t find another answer that’s more meaningful than my family. Like many other people, my family is the first who introduce me to God, feed me, and even free me to pursue whatever I want. My mom especially is the best privilege that I ever have.

Growing up, I’ve seen her handle everything alone. She take care of us when dad is away for months in the sea. She cook, took us to school, take care of the house, do the fixing, and everyting alone. I don’t even need to mop the floor when I was a kid. Thinking about it now makes me feel guilty.

I used to think that I resemble my father the most. He’s quite and less expressive as I am. But now I realized that I couldn’t be like today without my mother’s strength. She pass me down her independence, her grit, her bravery. And I couldn’t be more thankful for that.

A call with my mom that afternoon remind me how precious she is. We talked for almost an hour, which is not the usual case. I cursed myself when the call ended because my data was run out. It’s such a bad timing. But still, my heart was burst with happiness after the call because I’ve been missing her so much lately.

A week later when my flight finally leaves Ngurah Rai airport, I couldn’t help but to think about my dad when our plane pass through the Benoa bay. The tranquil sea water reminds me of how lonely he might feel all this time. Away from his family for months and befriend with the sea breeze.

I’ve been living away from my parents from 15 and I’ll be turning 25 next month. While people say that it takes 10.000 hours to master a skill, I think I’m still struggling with homesick despite almost a decade of practice.